Posts
Merry Christmas Everyone
I thought that I'd like to give you all a Christmas Gift this year. So far I've done well and people (meaning my wife) have loved every gift I've given. Let's see if I keep the streak alive.
I hope you enjoy
or click the link below if the video doesn't load
Chimpanzee Riding a Segway
Signs You’ve Used Too Much Curry Powder in the Recipe or How NOT to Make Honey Mustard Chicken
Sunday, December 21, 2008
I need to say before I get into this that usually I do all right in the kitchen. There are a small handful of dishes that I make well. My wife loves my lasagna and homemade pizza.
Last night I tried to branch out. I found a recipe for honey mustard chicken.
Sounds yummy doesn’t it?
And it was convenient because I had almost all the ingredients: all six of them. Once I gathered the last two ingredients I needed I had fun making dinner. I prepped my salad. I turned the rice cooker on so that it could do it’s thing. And I mixed up the honey mustard sauce: honey, mustard, margarine, curry and a pinch of paprika.
Easy as could be.
Unless you misread how much of each ingredient to put in.
The funny thing about cooking, that I have learned, is that generally speaking if you’re a little off on one of the ingredients no one might notice it. The difference in the amount of honey between the 1/2 cup it calls for and 1/2 cup plus a teaspoon is nominal.
Being greatly off in the proportions, however, is quite noticeable.
Say for example, the recipe calls for 2-4 teaspoons of curry powder, and you put in a 1/4 cup.
That is a grand difference.
And that is very noticeable.
At that point you cannot call your dinner Honey Mustard Chicken. That my friend, is weird curry chicken.
And that is what I made last night.
Don’t get the impression that it was bad. It was good curry. It was just incredibly strong. Oh, and I can’t recommend anyone making curry quite like that.
I took me a few bites to notice that my honey mustard chicken tasted more like curry then honey or mustard. I should have notice while it was cooking, or when the whole house began smelling like curry, but I didn’t.
Here now, to help you know when you’ve used too much curry powder in your recipe are Signs You’ve Used Too Much Curry Powder in Your Recipe
Sign 1: If your yellow curry is such a dark brown that it takes equal parts curry to sour cream to get it yellow--you’ve used too much curry powder in your recipe
Sign 2: If you’re biting into your curry and think there is sand in it, when really you’ve used so much curry powder that it couldn’t all dissolve--you’ve used too much curry powder in your recipe
Sign 3: If you pick your wife up from her 12 hour shift and the first thing she says once in the car is: “it smells like curry in here!”--you’ve used too much curry powder in your recipe.
Sign 4: If the day after your curry incident, you pick your clothes up off the floor and they all smell like curry--you’ve used too much curry powder in your recipe.
Sign 5: If your wife announces that she’s going to wash the sheets in three days after you stop sweating curry--you’ve used too much curry powder in your recipe.
Sign 6: If everything used to cook your meal is now stained yellow--you've used too much curry powder in your recipe.
Here’s wishing you a curry mishap free Christmas.
Last night I tried to branch out. I found a recipe for honey mustard chicken.
Sounds yummy doesn’t it?
And it was convenient because I had almost all the ingredients: all six of them. Once I gathered the last two ingredients I needed I had fun making dinner. I prepped my salad. I turned the rice cooker on so that it could do it’s thing. And I mixed up the honey mustard sauce: honey, mustard, margarine, curry and a pinch of paprika.
Easy as could be.
Unless you misread how much of each ingredient to put in.
The funny thing about cooking, that I have learned, is that generally speaking if you’re a little off on one of the ingredients no one might notice it. The difference in the amount of honey between the 1/2 cup it calls for and 1/2 cup plus a teaspoon is nominal.
Being greatly off in the proportions, however, is quite noticeable.
Say for example, the recipe calls for 2-4 teaspoons of curry powder, and you put in a 1/4 cup.
That is a grand difference.
And that is very noticeable.
At that point you cannot call your dinner Honey Mustard Chicken. That my friend, is weird curry chicken.
And that is what I made last night.
Don’t get the impression that it was bad. It was good curry. It was just incredibly strong. Oh, and I can’t recommend anyone making curry quite like that.
I took me a few bites to notice that my honey mustard chicken tasted more like curry then honey or mustard. I should have notice while it was cooking, or when the whole house began smelling like curry, but I didn’t.
Here now, to help you know when you’ve used too much curry powder in your recipe are Signs You’ve Used Too Much Curry Powder in Your Recipe
Sign 1: If your yellow curry is such a dark brown that it takes equal parts curry to sour cream to get it yellow--you’ve used too much curry powder in your recipe
Sign 2: If you’re biting into your curry and think there is sand in it, when really you’ve used so much curry powder that it couldn’t all dissolve--you’ve used too much curry powder in your recipe
Sign 3: If you pick your wife up from her 12 hour shift and the first thing she says once in the car is: “it smells like curry in here!”--you’ve used too much curry powder in your recipe.
Sign 4: If the day after your curry incident, you pick your clothes up off the floor and they all smell like curry--you’ve used too much curry powder in your recipe.
Sign 5: If your wife announces that she’s going to wash the sheets in three days after you stop sweating curry--you’ve used too much curry powder in your recipe.
Sign 6: If everything used to cook your meal is now stained yellow--you've used too much curry powder in your recipe.
Here’s wishing you a curry mishap free Christmas.
Gifts I Don't Want For Christmas
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Every year countless people get gifts they don't like. Then there's the awkward moment where you have to thank someone for something you'll either try and return or hold on to until you have a garage sale or drop off at a thrift store.
To help my loved ones buy meaningful gifts here is a list of a few things I don't want for Christmas:
1: Whopper Scented Cologne Not only have I never had the desire to smell like greasy flame broiled meat, Sheena got violently ill any time She smelled burgers during the early stages of her pregnancy. I'm just thinking that smelling like a burger is still a bad thing.
2: A coupon book of expired coupons or gift certificates
3: A saliva collection kit so that I can have my genetics tested.
4: A "Guinna Pigs Rule The World" t-shirt. I think that speaks for itself.
5: This necklace that gives new meaning to the idea of crappy jewelry
6: Game worn protective cup. Game worn jerseys are big, but I think there's a reason they're the only ting.
7: This little item made me smile, but seems rather inappropriate. I think I'll pass.
8: Cat Pencil Sharpener. I'm sorry, but I put my pencil where to sharpen it. No thank you.
9: Now you can buy nothing. I think the point of all this is so that I'll end up with something as opposed to nothing. Nothing is what I get when I get a bunch of junk I'll never use.
10: A travel Bidet. I don't have a bidet in my house, so why would I want one for the road.
11: A Back Shaver. I just simply think it's too late for this one. Maybe ten years ago it would have worked.
12: Perhaps this one takes the cake as the thing I least want for Christmas
Well, I hope this helps.
So, what's the worst gift you ever got?
To help my loved ones buy meaningful gifts here is a list of a few things I don't want for Christmas:
1: Whopper Scented Cologne Not only have I never had the desire to smell like greasy flame broiled meat, Sheena got violently ill any time She smelled burgers during the early stages of her pregnancy. I'm just thinking that smelling like a burger is still a bad thing.
2: A coupon book of expired coupons or gift certificates
3: A saliva collection kit so that I can have my genetics tested.
4: A "Guinna Pigs Rule The World" t-shirt. I think that speaks for itself.
5: This necklace that gives new meaning to the idea of crappy jewelry
6: Game worn protective cup. Game worn jerseys are big, but I think there's a reason they're the only ting.
7: This little item made me smile, but seems rather inappropriate. I think I'll pass.
8: Cat Pencil Sharpener. I'm sorry, but I put my pencil where to sharpen it. No thank you.
9: Now you can buy nothing. I think the point of all this is so that I'll end up with something as opposed to nothing. Nothing is what I get when I get a bunch of junk I'll never use.
10: A travel Bidet. I don't have a bidet in my house, so why would I want one for the road.
11: A Back Shaver. I just simply think it's too late for this one. Maybe ten years ago it would have worked.
12: Perhaps this one takes the cake as the thing I least want for Christmas
Well, I hope this helps.
So, what's the worst gift you ever got?
Ice Ice Baby
Monday, December 15, 2008
I walked to work today. I didn’t want to.
This morning as I scrapped the ice off my wife’s car it was twenty degrees below freezing. And it had snowed lots on the weekend. It was not pleasant conditions for the thirty-five minute walk to work.
I didn’t want to walk to work today, but my van wouldn’t start. Prior to this past June my Volkswagen spent its entire life on Vancouver Island. It isn’t used to the cold.
Neither am I.
I set my iPod to shuffle and began my walk.
Vanilla Ice came on. Minutes before I gave my nose the same nickname.
Of the thousand plus songs on my iPod “Ice Ice Baby” was the soundtrack for my walk. Proof Steve Jobs really does know everything.
Last night while going to bed Sheena told me, “If you walk to work this week wear a gloves, a toque and a scarf.”
In my head was, “If I walk? There’s no way I’m walking to work when the forecasted daily highs are –11 or colder.” I said, “sure thing honey.”
I wore the gloves. If you see my left ear lobe I’d like it back. It’s not that I have any use for it anymore, but I’m sentimentally attached.
Especially since I’m no longer physically attached.
It’s not that I wanted to be cold; it’s just that I don’t like toques because they don’t flatter the shape of my head. My hair is a better compliment. Toques show off its massive shape. They leave nothing to the imagination. At least with my hair you’re left wondering, “How much of that thing is hair and how much is head?” Oh, and I don’t have a scarf. I guess I’m as ill prepared for the cold as my Volkswagen.
It was sunny today too. That threw me off. On the island sunny equals warm. Here the sun lies to me.
Sheena should have told me to wear sunglasses. Now I can hardly see. I hope that explains the typos.
I don’t know that I would have worn sunglasses. I leave them in my van. I don’t imagine putting sub zero metal frames on my face would be comfortable.
I don’t blame her; I’m just saying she should have warned me. She knows these things. She lived for two years in a place that has real winters. She’s winter wise. That’s why her vehicle starts in the cold
When I applied for this job all sorts of good people told me that winters aren’t that cold here. It turns out cold is a relative thing. And that they are all liars.
I’m so gullible.
These good people also told me it hardly ever snows here. “Just a couple inches all winter” they said. “And it’s usually gone the next day.” They lie so much here.
Why did I believe them?
I’m so gullible.
“Yesterday in church a guy told me we had more snow this weekend then all of last year.”
I don’t believe him.
I’m not falling for it any more.
This morning as I scrapped the ice off my wife’s car it was twenty degrees below freezing. And it had snowed lots on the weekend. It was not pleasant conditions for the thirty-five minute walk to work.
I didn’t want to walk to work today, but my van wouldn’t start. Prior to this past June my Volkswagen spent its entire life on Vancouver Island. It isn’t used to the cold.
Neither am I.
I set my iPod to shuffle and began my walk.
Vanilla Ice came on. Minutes before I gave my nose the same nickname.
Of the thousand plus songs on my iPod “Ice Ice Baby” was the soundtrack for my walk. Proof Steve Jobs really does know everything.
Last night while going to bed Sheena told me, “If you walk to work this week wear a gloves, a toque and a scarf.”
In my head was, “If I walk? There’s no way I’m walking to work when the forecasted daily highs are –11 or colder.” I said, “sure thing honey.”
I wore the gloves. If you see my left ear lobe I’d like it back. It’s not that I have any use for it anymore, but I’m sentimentally attached.
Especially since I’m no longer physically attached.
It’s not that I wanted to be cold; it’s just that I don’t like toques because they don’t flatter the shape of my head. My hair is a better compliment. Toques show off its massive shape. They leave nothing to the imagination. At least with my hair you’re left wondering, “How much of that thing is hair and how much is head?” Oh, and I don’t have a scarf. I guess I’m as ill prepared for the cold as my Volkswagen.
It was sunny today too. That threw me off. On the island sunny equals warm. Here the sun lies to me.
Sheena should have told me to wear sunglasses. Now I can hardly see. I hope that explains the typos.
I don’t know that I would have worn sunglasses. I leave them in my van. I don’t imagine putting sub zero metal frames on my face would be comfortable.
I don’t blame her; I’m just saying she should have warned me. She knows these things. She lived for two years in a place that has real winters. She’s winter wise. That’s why her vehicle starts in the cold
When I applied for this job all sorts of good people told me that winters aren’t that cold here. It turns out cold is a relative thing. And that they are all liars.
I’m so gullible.
These good people also told me it hardly ever snows here. “Just a couple inches all winter” they said. “And it’s usually gone the next day.” They lie so much here.
Why did I believe them?
I’m so gullible.
“Yesterday in church a guy told me we had more snow this weekend then all of last year.”
I don’t believe him.
I’m not falling for it any more.
Thoughts on John the Baptist
Recently in preparation for christmas, and preparing a talk for the youth, I was reading about the birth of John who would later become know as “the Baptist.” I was reading this story in Luke while also thinking about the baby growing inside my wife who will be called _____ Miller.
My wife and I keep having discussions about “Pastor’s Kids” and how to raise our kids so that people will be surprised to find that their dad is a pastor.
I was also thinking about that as I read through Luke.
That’s when a detail about the story jumped out at me like never before: John was a pastors kid. (Okay, technically he was a priest’s kid, but close enough. For more on Priests kids refer to 1 Samuel 2.)
My heart sunk a bit at the thought.
Usually, I associate John the Baptist with his wild living. Not wild in the traditional sense with booze and hookers. But in the sense that he was some wild guy living out in the desert eating bugs and wearing ridiculous clothing. He sounds a bit like a freak. I don’t think I’ll be happy if my daughter ever brings home a John the Baptist.
But consider John from God’s perspective. Here is a bit of a synopsis of what God told
Zechariah, John’s father, when God was foretelling John’s birth:
- He will be great in the Lord’s eyes.
- He will be filled with the Holy Spirit from Birth.
- He will bring people back to God.
- He will go in the Spirit and power of Elijah (Elijah was the greatest prophet in Hebrew history. There were few regarded as highly as Elijah. He was a legend.) to turn the hearts of fathers to their children and the disobedient to the wisdom of the righteous.
- He will prepare the people for their Lord.
What a beautiful view of John’s life. I hope this will be true of my child too. I hope my kids will be people who actively turn hearts to God.
Funny, that’s exactly what I hope my life is about.
I hope I will be a father who can aid their child in this pursuit, regardless of the forms it takes on.
Rappin' with my Saviour
Thursday, December 4, 2008
I struck up a conversation with God this morning as I walked to work. It was a beautiful morning with blue skies, dry air and sub freezing temperatures. The conversation was a casual one, the kind that you might have with a fried. I love that being justified makes way for such intimate moments with God—moments where we can simply chat, or rap with my Saviour as the kids would say back in the 90’s*.
I love conversing with God in this relaxed manner. Prayer stripped of its formal posturing feels more genuine. I feel closer to God in those moments: like I can more easily see Him.
But now after today, I’m wondering if I’m seeing God, or if I’m only seeing a presupposition of God.
Here’s what happened: while praying I found myself explaining to God what I said and why, and what I really meant by my comments—as if He didn’t understand me. I often only explain myself in that way when I feel as though I’m being misunderstood. It’s a classic sign that I’m rapidly becoming defensive. I often get defensive when I get insecure. Insecurity leads to defensiveness.
But why would I get that way with God?
Why would I feel insecure?
Why would I think He didn’t understand my heart?
Why would I feel the need to explain myself as if He didn’t know me?
My prayer revealed something. I have, despite my attempts at being genuine, made subconscious assumptions about Him. I assumed that He is like other people. With others I sometimes feel the need to explain what I mean. I know that I don’t always clearly communicate what’s in my heart and that leads to confusion.
My subconscious assumption of God was, ultimately, that He could only know of me what others knew of me.
I was imposing on God human limitations that He is not bound to.
God understands me. God knows my heart even when my words don’t properly reveal what’s in there. And God knew everything about me before I was born.
God knows me.
How often do we have inherent assumptions about God that are far from true? Do we, often without realizing it, assume things about Him that are false? I would never say that God doesn’t know my heart, but apparently, I act as if He doesn’t. While I would never say that God doesn’t understand me, I explain myself away to Him as if He doesn’t.
I don’t think God needs me to do that.
So what does your language with God reveal? What are your actions or words really saying? Are there subconscious assumptions you’re making about God that are far from true about His nature?
May we live out the truth of our great God and Saviour. May we be people who know God fully and not place our insecurities, and the limitations of humans on Him.
*or did the cool kids stop saying that in the 80’s and it was just that I was a big nerd who took ten years to catch on.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
