Gifts I Don't Want For Christmas

Thursday, December 18, 2008
Every year countless people get gifts they don't like. Then there's the awkward moment where you have to thank someone for something you'll either try and return or hold on to until you have a garage sale or drop off at a thrift store.

To help my loved ones buy meaningful gifts here is a list of a few things I don't want for Christmas:

1: Whopper Scented Cologne Not only have I never had the desire to smell like greasy flame broiled meat, Sheena got violently ill any time She smelled burgers during the early stages of her pregnancy. I'm just thinking that smelling like a burger is still a bad thing.

2: A coupon book of expired coupons or gift certificates

3: A saliva collection kit so that I can have my genetics tested.

4: A "Guinna Pigs Rule The World" t-shirt. I think that speaks for itself.

5: This necklace that gives new meaning to the idea of crappy jewelry

6: Game worn protective cup. Game worn jerseys are big, but I think there's a reason they're the only ting.

7: This little item made me smile, but seems rather inappropriate. I think I'll pass.

8: Cat Pencil Sharpener. I'm sorry, but I put my pencil where to sharpen it. No thank you.

9: Now you can buy nothing. I think the point of all this is so that I'll end up with something as opposed to nothing. Nothing is what I get when I get a bunch of junk I'll never use.

10: A travel Bidet. I don't have a bidet in my house, so why would I want one for the road.

11: A Back Shaver. I just simply think it's too late for this one. Maybe ten years ago it would have worked.

12: Perhaps this one takes the cake as the thing I least want for Christmas

Well, I hope this helps.

So, what's the worst gift you ever got?