An Open Letter to Cucumbers

Monday, January 17, 2011
Dear Cucumbers:

Last night I sliced one of you for the sole purpose of using you as a cracker. It was amazing. You make an amazing delivery platform for cheese. Have you considered marketing yourselves along these lines?

Think about it. Everyone know's that you're great in sandwiches, or with dip, and some even like you plain, or with a bit of fresh ground salt and pepper. But as a substitute for crackers? That is revolutionary.

Why were you not on billboards when everyone was crazy with Atkins fever? A carb free cracker? Some would think no such thing exists. Oh, but they would be wrong. You, my long english friend, make for excellent crackers.

Or were you hoping to keep that a secret?

Regardless, I suggest a marketing campaign with the slogan: "The New Cracker!"

Think about it.

Stay tasty Cucumbers, stay tasty.